Project Alchemy Part Eight: Rewrite Your Story

Project Alchemy Part Eight: Rewrite Your Story

One of the hardest parts of any 'failure' is having a so-called black mark on your personal history.  People who have gone through a business or project failure, bankruptcy, or divorce, often express feelings of depression.  Suddenly, their vision of themselves has completely shifted.  

Rather than being the hero or heroine of their own story, they feel lost.  No one likes to feel lost - this is inevitable what leads to feelings of depression.  At this point, it is imperative to remember that most of what we believe others are thinking, is made up in our own minds ... bred by a weakened self-esteem.

There is a rather simple solution to all of this: Rewrite your own story.

Therapists use this with children who have experienced abuse.  Children are asked to re-frame their history of abuse and see themselves as a survivor rather than as a victim.  This shift of perspective is not just an exercise in storytelling; it can radically change one’s view on the events within his or her life, as well as greatly improve the outlook for the future.

Here’s how you can apply this to your life:

Let’s say you were let go from your dream job in the recent recession.  You have had trouble finding work, and had to take a position far below your capabilities, delivering pizza at night to make ends meet.  You might be thinking, “This is so brutal, I can’t even find another job.”

STOP!  This is where the vicious cycle begins ... directly with these initial thoughts that are downplaying to our lives, our selves, our abilities.

Rewrite your story in a positive manner.  Tell yourself you’re not willing to take unemployment or be supported by family members until you get a job you consider at “your level.”  Do what needs to be done to feed the children.  You’ll do what you have to, to support yourself.  This is incredibly positive, and honorable.  

We are all here, contributing to society, in ways that we can and in ways we know how.  This keeps us healthy on all levels - physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually.  Look at the characteristics you’re exhibiting in doing what needs to be done: perseverance, pride, and a strong work ethic – all far from weak, all far from unsuccessful.

Here’s another example.  You planned your first webinar and had three attendees, with your expenses far outpacing your revenue.  You feel like a complete failure, and you’re ready to throw in the towel completely.

Let’s rewrite this event: You haven’t lost anything.  Instead, you’ve learned some important skills and lessons.  You’ve taken a risk, and while it didn’t turn out the way you’d planned, one mistake does not a business failure make.  Instead of thinking it’s a message that you should quit, try to see it as the necessary “first draft” of your very own story.

If it’s up to us to decide how we want to tell our stories, why not choose a positive spin to put on it?  We are the primary characters in the stories of our lives.  Regardless of occurring events, we are and will remain, the heroes and heroines of our stories.  Claiming how you define yourself is the first step - reclaiming your power will inevitably follow.  And this is worth well more than its weight in gold.

Want to see where this article series first began?  Awesome.  Go here. 

Want to move on to Part Nine?  Really awesome.  Go here.